Q: Dear Mr. Bean, what do you think of the U.S. Border Patrol commissioning Mexican radio stations to play songs about the dangers of illegal border crossings?
-Suspicious Mind
A: Dear Suspicious, El Frijole Mágico thinks it stinks! To start with, prior to the creation of the Border Patrol in 1924, there was no such thing as illegal immigration from Mexico. The idea of an "illegal alien" was born along with the agency. Since then, the agency has been largely ineffectual in preventing so called illegal immigration. The increased use of border fences, new technologies, and so on has only forced those who wish to cross illegally to seek out the least guarded locations, which also tend to be the most dangerous. So you could say that, in effect, the Border Patrol (henceforth, la migra) itself has created the dangerous situations immigrants face.
Then there's the fact that the CD is called Migracorridos, which is either very clever or very stupid on the part of la migra. Clever if they realize that "la migra" is a derogatory term, and so people are attracted to the album because of their hatred for the agency (and this may be the case, given that la migra is very quiet about its involvement in the project). Stupid if they don't realize this, and I can't tell whether they do or don't.
Because the rationale for the entire project is so stupid. Do these pendejos really think that immigrants don't realize the danger they face? Do they think they don't realize coyotes are trying to exploit them? A representative for la migra says the point of the corridos is to make potential immigrants "think about their families" before they risk an illegal crossing. All they're thinking about is their families, idiota. They're thinking about how they can afford to support their families, and this is why they cross in spite of the risks. Maybe these songs have been well received, but probably because people can commiserate, not because they've been convinced.
Q: A Luchador, I'm asking if you agree with the decision to allow immigrants with temporary visas to join the Army.
-That One Dude
A: Dude, El Frijole Mágico does not agree with this decision! There's nothing about this that isn't exploitative. These pinche gringo Army guys are dangling the proverbial carrot in front of immigrants seeking U.S. citizenship, saying that serving in the Army will allow them to become a citizen in as little as six months, compared to the ten years most people have to wait. But the U.S. has two wars on with no sign of an end, so before they can become citizens, they'll have to survive. And they will be sent to war. Because the Army is looking for those who can translate "languages useful in combat zones like Afghanistan and Iraq."
Of course, this isn't particularly surprising, considering that the U.S. Armed Forces have always exploited disenfranchised populations with promises of opportunities for economic advancement. Remember when the Army lured Blacks and Chicanos with promises of a college education (and didn't draft those already enrolled in college, i.e., not Blacks and Chicanos), and then Blacks and Chicanos died in disproportionately large numbers in Vietnam, WWII, and so on?
Thankfully, though, Luchadors aren't the only ones who oppose the decision. In situations like these, one can always rely on the paranoia of racist and xenophobic officers and veterans, suspicious of terrorist infiltration.
Well, that's all for today! Adios,
El Frijole Mágico
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