Life lesson learned: if you have to finish a beer in a hurry, don't brush your teeth immediately after. Because you will burp, and you will spray toothpaste everywhere.

To paraphrase Eazy-E, baby carrots in my lap, and they're freezing my balls.

Often when I come home drunk, I decide that's a good time to catch up on emails I've left unanswered, so I'll shoot off like eight in a row. I've stopped answering student emails, but it's about the only time I manage to write to my mom.

One thing I've noticed about it is that while my spelling doesn't suffer (even if my typing does), my confidence in my ability to spell is severely diminished. So if I ever send you an email in which common words are spelled correctly, but followed by a '(sp?)', that might be a tell.

For Halloween this year, I was thinking of dressing as a "colored" pencil, which would just be me being Mexican (like I do) inside a pencil costume. But I don't think anyone would get it in Canada, first because you can't make jokes about race in Canada, but also because they call colo(u)red pencils "pencil crayons". I'm generally very happy to be living in Canada, but things like pencil crayons give me pause.